The 7 Cs of Communication:

Drs. John Baird and Jim Stull wrote the 7 Cs of Communication, which are widely used today. They aim their advice at written communications. Here I've adapted it for the spoken word.

1.     Clear -  be clear as to your intent; don't make your audience read between the lines, which can lead to confusion and frustration. Be straightforward and fully explain what you mean.

2.     Concise -  less is more. Have you heard of the 80/20 rule? Many folks spend 80 percent of their time explaining things that aren't much value to the audience. So mine the 20 percent of substance and build on it. Don't ramble.

3.     Concrete -  turn your words into pictures.  Use colorful words and images. Lean toward the specific and away from the abstract. You say your product is "better" now? Exactly what does that mean for the customer who will buy and use it?

4.     Correct -  double-check your facts and be careful of plagiarism. If you want to use someone else's quote or material, be sure to attribute it. Also, avoid making sweeping generalities or opinions that have no factual basis. Finally, don't represent your opinions as "facts." That's counterproductive and may turn people off.

5.     Coherent -  connect the dots -  don't make people guess. This goes back to knowing what your audience knows. Don't assume they've read your book, are familiar with your business, or possess advanced business expertise. A key challenge is a mixed audience with a wide band of sophistication. My advice is to start out at a lower level and work your way up.

6.     Complete -  there are all kinds of angles to this one.  Speak in complete thoughts, Don't make your reader guess what they should conclude. Avoid speaking in shorthand and using confusing acronyms.

7.     Courteous -  we do not need to insult others just to make our points. A condescending or arrogant speaker is quickly turned off. An audience is far more likely to warm up to a speaker who is respectful of them. Avoid slang, locker talk, and profanity. It's just not appropriate.

bonus one

8.     Connect  -  engage your audience as much as possible. Open your speech or meeting with a show of hands. Ask your audience questions. Invite their questions. Always use eye contact and look for signs of affirmation that folks are listening. If you see eyes wandering or people sneaking out the door, stop and ask the audience what they want to hear about.

Increase Self Esteem

Dr. Denis Waitley
(excerpted from The Psychology of Motivation)

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Following are six behaviors that increase self-esteem, enhance your self-confidence, and spur your motivation. You may recognize some of them as things you naturally do in your interactions with other people. But if you don't, I suggest you motivate yourself to take some of these important steps immediately.

First, greet others with a smile and look them directly in the eye. A smile and direct eye contact convey confidence born of self-respect. In the same way, answer the phone pleasantly whether at work or at home, and when placing a call, give your name before asking to speak to the party you want to reach. Leading with your name underscores that a person with self-respect is making the call.

Second, always show real appreciation for a gift or complement. Don't downplay or sidestep expressions of affection or honor from others. The ability to accept or receive is a universal mark of an individual with solid self-esteem.

Third, don't brag. It's almost a paradox that genuine modesty is actually part of the capacity to gracefully receive compliments. People who brag about their own exploits or demand special attention are simply trying to build themselves up in the eyes of others—and that's because they don't perceive themselves as already worthy of respect.

Fourth, don't make your problems the centerpiece of your conversation. Talk positively about your life and the progress you're trying to make. Be aware of any negative thinking, and take notice of how often you complain. When you hear yourself criticize someone—and this includes self-criticism— find a way to be helpful instead of critical.

Fifth, respond to difficult times or depressing moments by increasing your level of productive activity. When your self- esteem is being challenged, don't sit around and fall victim to "paralysis by analysis."

Sixth, choose to see mistakes and rejections as opportunities to learn. View a failure as the conclusion of one performance, not the end of your entire career. Own up to your shortcomings, but refuse to see yourself as a failure. A failure may be something you have done—and it may even be something you'll have to do again on the way to success—but a failure is definitely not something you are.

8 Keys To Building Charisma

1. Mirroring

This simple technique was the inspiration for this article. Mirroring is copying the other person’s physical mannerisms, movements and facial expressions when engaged in a conversation. You become a mirror image of the other person. (seeWikipedia)

Mirroring happens naturally in social interactions, but when you are conscious of it and are aware of its affects, it can be used as a tool in effective communication for generating rapport.

Mirroring someone closely will cause you to feel what they’re feeling (to some extent). I did an exercise once, in a group of three, during a workshop. One person starts by visualizing a scene; seeing, feeling and experiencing the scene. A second person imitates this person’s facial expressions and physical postures. A third person adjusts the second person’s facial expressions and physical postures until he thinks that they are identical. After several minutes, the second person explains what she was feeling. Not only does the second person feel the feelings of the first person, but will at times see what the first person is seeing in his imagination. I was blown away after trying this out, myself.

Next time you’re engaged in a conversation with someone, try mirroring body language, posture, and facial expressions. You will find that the conversation suddenly feels very friendly and open.

For example, you are sitting across the table from someone. You watch them pick up a glass of water with their left hand and gently lean forward, then to the right. You mirror them by holding your glass of water with your right hand, leaning forward and towards the left.

Try it next time … just for fun. :)

2. Remembering Names

Personally, I’m always impressed when others I’ve just met remember my name and use it in a sentence. Since birth, our parents, teachers, friends, and family, have hard wired the sound of our name in our brain. It is certain to get your attention, instantly. It makes you feel important and respected, filling our desire for attention and love.

Recall the last time someone who you just met parted by declaring “Nice to meet you, [insert your name]!” Weren’t you impressed? They are clearly interested in you enough to remember your name, and you want to show them the same respect.

Always make an effort to remember people’s names. Here are some techniques to help you.

3. Be Interested

People love talking about themselves, seriously.

Ask questions that the other person will enjoy answering. If it’s a complete stranger, start with the basics and dig deeper. Rephrase their words to make sure you really understand what they’re saying. You can think of this technique asverbal mirroring. By asking questions about their interests or feelings, you are mirroring their interest in themselves.

Really listen when the person is answering. Only when you are listening will you actually absorb what was said and will actually feel interested. If you run into a boring conversation, find ideas that do interest you and re-focus the conversation. Ask questions. Make it a game.

4. Allowing Others to Talk

In addition to asking questions, it’s important to allow the other person to talk. This means, stop talking. Stop talking about yourself, stop inserting your opinions, refrain from interrupting.

Next time you’re engaged in a conversation, practice not saying anything after asking a question. This might mean not speaking for several minutes *gasp*. Even when the other person appears to be finished, practice not speaking for 30 seconds. Often times, the person is still thinking, is actually pausing, and will start speaking again. By doing so, you will get a lot more depth from that person.

Many girlfriends I know have the interruption problem, myself included. Pay particular attention to this skill, you’ll be amazed at the wealth of thoughtful goodness coming from your partner. Being a patient listener is a great way to connect with and get to know people.

Try it: ask a question and then zip up. Listen and learn.

5. Intention

Send out the intention that you would like to get to know this person better, to really listen to them and to be there for them. I’m always amazed at the power of intention, which I believe is the seed for starting anything, whether it is a goal or a friendship.

Make a wish for the other person. Send out a positive intention for your interaction.

6. Offer Help

We are mostly self seeking and are driven by motivations that benefit us, with the exception of some extreme cases and parent-child relationships. But let’s face-it, we are self-seeking most of the time because it is a natural part of our survival instincts. Even if we are working on a good cause, we almost always have a reason for helping that is personally beneficial.

When others genuinely offer their help, we feel particularly fond of them. Why? Offering help is a kind gesture that implies a respect and admiration for you. And when we put ourselves in their shoes, wouldn’t it be advantageous to offer help to others?

I’m a big believer in giving more than I take in return. And my personal motto: “To get what you want, help others get what they want, first.”

Find a need that others have that you can provide. Offer help. Even just a casual email offering help will make the world of difference towards how this person feels about you.

7. Smile

“Everytime you smile at someone, it is an action of love,
a gift to that person, a beautiful thing.”
~ Mother Teresa

Do you remember how you felt when you saw a genuine smile? Or awkwardly standing in an elevator full of strangers and suddenly someone smiles at you? It really is contagious and shifts your state to a positive one.

Smile genuinely. Start by smiling at friends. Try lifting the spirits of passing strangers.

8. Authenticity

Any of the above techniques will work by themselves, but become highly effective only when combined with authenticity.

Always be genuine and be your complete self, no more and no less. When you are completely honest and speaking from your heart, you will exuberate a kind of energy that people cannot help but to connect with. In that moment, you are pure, expressive, and radiating your true self. When others see and recognize that side of you, they are really seeing a reflection of that part of themselves.

Just be yourself.

Summary:

1. Mirroring
2. Remember Names
3. Be Interested
4. Allow Others to Talk
5. Intention
6. Offer Help
7. Smile
8. Authenticity

Suggestion For Success

Is It Worth It?

Teach students to Rate Themselves on a 1-10

The Cone Of Learning

Teaching - a definition

  Use Teach in a sentence

Teach

verb (used with object), taught, teach·ing.

 

 

1.impart knowledge of or skill in; give instruction in: She teaches mathematics. Synonyms: coach.

2. to impart knowledge or skill to; give instruction to: He teaches a large class. Synonyms: inform, enlighten, discipline, drill, school, indoctrinate; coach.

verb (used without object), taught, teach·ing.

3. to impart knowledge or skill; give instruction. Synonyms: inform, enlighten, discipline, drill, school, indoctrinate; coach.